/v/ - The Vineyard

Wine Connoisseur 10/06/25(Fri)02:13 No. 1129 [Reply]

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Hello /v/,

I have a job as a cheesemonger. I get to be near cheese and sample various cheese all day erry'day. There's nothing I enjoy more than taking home a nice Gouda or some Halloumi and eating it while I stick my dick in some Port or Merlot.

What are /v/'s favorite cheeses and accompanying wines?

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/30(Wed)04:57 No. 1705

>>1146
Camembert you lout.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/31(Thu)10:21 No. 1707

I thought this was a classy lot. Cheese is for inserting in the rectum whilst dipping. I can't believe you savages eat the stuff.

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Wine Connoisseur 12/01/16(Mon)16:51 No. 2122

>>1707

I believe, good sir, that these gentlemen are participating in some manner of "internet joke".

Nobody is really eating cheese old man.

Wine Connoisseur 11/03/10(Thu)00:50 No. 1638 [Reply]

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You will, I trust, excuse me if I do not join you. But, I have already come, and I never dip my penis into... wine.

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MistressC!sa718qMb8I 11/03/19(Sat)06:37 No. 1671

>>1661

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MistressC!sa718qMb8I 11/03/19(Sat)06:39 No. 1672

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>>1661

lol
forgot to post this picture the first time

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/27(Sun)07:15 No. 1697

>>1638
Your attire suggests you as a gentleman of some taste; perhaps you might try it? I assure you it will bring you nothing but pleasure.

Wine Connoisseur 11/03/19(Sat)02:43 No. 1669 [Reply]

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/20(Sun)07:33 No. 1675

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/22(Tue)20:37 No. 1689

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/26(Sat)03:58 No. 1694

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/21(Mon)23:24 No. 1681 [Reply]

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This is what i plunge my gentleman stick into, warning: it's not for the feint of heart it's pinot noir from 1727!!!, only the most sophisticated of dippers are welcome.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/22(Tue)11:04 No. 1686

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pinot = penis
noir = black

Enjoy your dip

Terrible confession :( Philip de Courvalle 11/03/21(Mon)18:17 No. 1679 [Reply]

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Last Saturday I was at Gaston De Court's exquisite dipping party in Le Mans, France. Everything was going great, fine Merlot, distinguished Shiraz, and exotic Cabernet Sauvignon, o what a ball it was till Gaston's brother, Louis introduced some champagne to dip in at first i was repulsed by such a savage offer but... in a moment of euphoria and wanting to fit in with the crowd i proceeded to dip into the Champagne afterward i felt ashamed and have since contemplated suicide for my actions, i guess what i am asking is, is life worth living after such a horrific blow to my dignity?

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AAdolfoBJCardinal!!R1ZmpkA2Sw 11/03/21(Mon)23:51 No. 1682

Only death's warm embrace will free you from the guilt.

May The Almighty One have mercy on your soul.

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Donatello 11/03/22(Tue)02:03 No. 1683

May your death be swift savage!

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/22(Tue)09:34 No. 1684

Partying with Frenchies? Sir, you had it coming.

Wine Connoisseur 11/02/22(Tue)07:51 No. 1590 [Reply]

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I realize this petition does not inherently have to do with dipping, but I pose a question to all fellow wine connoisseurs:

I have planned for Friday of the next week that my girlfriend and I sit on my roof and enjoy a quiet evening watching the stars and drinking some wine.

However, I am not very well versed in the art of wine, and do not know which variety would be well suited for such an endeavor. Personally, I generally prefer white wines, though there has been a red or even rosé that has piqued my interest in the past.

So, gentlemen, what would you recommend to me?

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/01(Tue)08:17 No. 1630

>>1628

Thank you, kind sir, for naming a type of wine that I may actually be able to find and afford. Naming specific brands and much less years would be quite a feat for me as I do not live in a country where wine is frequently consumed. However, any and all more suggestions are always welcome and appreciated.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/01(Tue)16:41 No. 1632

>>1630
Though, I did give a very general suggestion, you should know that not all sweet reds are "bargain brand" names. They and their affection are entirely different from one another.
It's complete blasphemy to say, "Oh, cool, sweet red: sounds like a keeper." and to think that each branching vintage will yield the same amount of passion and love. Why, it's the same as assuming that a woman of your preferred race will be just as good in bed as any other... the fat ones as well.
I am completely right, though if you find yourself content with your "Barefoot Cellars" whore rather than the likes of my beloved "Chateau d’Yquem", that is fine; it leaves more for my enjoyment.
After all, you are just drinking it.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/18(Fri)20:15 No. 1667

Drinking wine? How bothersome.

LS 11/03/13(Sun)20:09 No. 1650 [Reply]

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would you fuck her

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/14(Mon)02:47 No. 1653

i sense a trap. either way yes.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/14(Mon)18:49 No. 1654

By chance, is her genitalia a glass of wine?

Wine Connoisseur 11/01/21(Fri)08:10 No. 1491 [Reply]

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So i just realized this board is all about dipping your cock into wine.

interesting.

At first i thought i was being trolled...

but no.

You guys are dipping your dicks in wine, like its the right way to utilize wine.

::golf clap::

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/07(Mon)16:20 No. 1531

man it took me forever to realize the jenkem board on fo 7chan was an elaborate troll.....this board is just plain weird though.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/27(Sun)05:46 No. 1625

hey guys! want to by some wine and dip you dick into a glass of that shit?

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Wine Connoisseur 11/03/01(Tue)01:56 No. 1629

>>1531
Oh shi-
*facepalm*
I was wondering how the fuck they did it erry day.

Urgent concerned girlfriend 11/02/08(Tue)23:58 No. 1536 [Reply]

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Hello, gentlemen. I come to you today with a bit of a problem. I started visiting The Vineyard shortly after my lover introduced to it to me as a joke of sorts. He claimed how he loved submerging his organ into only the finest wines.

A few weeks ago I caught him having relations in our chamber. I told him it was all fine and dandy if he enjoyed inserting his genitalia into a glass of wine as long as it did not effect the relationship between him and I.

It wasn't much more than a fortnight ago that he and I ceased having sex completely. I later learned it was due to his obsessive dipping. I even offered to host a party with wine in my own "vineyard" but he told me that I was misunderstanding him and kicked me out of the house. I am now homeless and loveless. Please, gentlemen, help me with my predicament. I have nowhere else to turn.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/11(Fri)06:58 No. 1544

>>1538

Have you considered taking wine vaginally or anally? Some "gentlemen" here seem to assume that without a penis one can only enjoy wine orally, however I do not subscribe to that sentiment.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/11(Fri)22:34 No. 1547

>>1544
I concur. The fairer sex should be able to enjoy a nice vintage without having to drink it like savages.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/27(Sun)22:20 No. 1626

On a serious note, be careful if you actually pour wine into the vagina/anus. It gets you drunk really fast.

Wine Connoisseur 11/02/19(Sat)12:41 No. 1577 [Reply]

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Anyone ever use habushu?
It's supposed to be good for you.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/21(Mon)11:18 No. 1587

I'd be too freaked out by those snakes to try, even if they weren't dead.

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/22(Tue)18:21 No. 1593

i dont doubt id give any gentlemens genitals an exotic aroma

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Wine Connoisseur 11/02/25(Fri)03:14 No. 1615

Let me tell ya that stuff is the shit. it shuts down you liver for about an hour so that anything else you drink goes directly to your blood stream.

you wanna get shit faced for cheap start with this stuff.