>>24817

Anon slammed the door to his apartment and fumed. Trump won the election?! How?! The Democrats had been so careful to constantly attack, belittle, and marginalize the majority of Americans, their victory had been all but assured!

He was just about to head to the kitchen for a snack when he heard a footstep behind him. Whirling around in surprise, he was shocked to see Donald Trump standing in his apartment, pointing a gold-plated Desert Eagle right at him.

"H-how did you get in here?!"

"I bought your apartment building. Since I now own it, I can enter any apartment I want, whenever I want, for an inspection. To make sure you're complying with the tenant rules."

Trump shakes his head in disappointment and points at the litter box in the corner of the living room.

"You've been a bad boy. You know pets aren't allowed; that was a condition of your lease."

"I'll get rid of the cat! I was just keeping it for a friend, honest! I swear!"

Gesturing with the gun, Trump forced Anon to walk into the bedroom.

"As per the new conditions of your lease, the penalty for violating the rules has increased. I'm gonna make these apartments great again, but to do that I'm gonna have to crack down on violators. Get on the bed."

Kneeling on the bed, Anon looked over his shoulder as Trump unbuckled the pants on his $5,000 suit.

"W-what are you gonna do to me?!"

"I'm gonna fuck you in the ass, and you're gonna pay for it. Your lease is going up $100 a month."

"W-wait, you're not serious! A-are you?"

Trump positioned himself behind Anon and replied, "Bite the pillow, I'm going in dry. Oh, and just to warn you..."

Trump leaned in and whispered into Anon's ear.

"It's gonna be yuge."

Anon spent the next six weeks ranting on his blog about how much his ass hurt, but nobody cared because America was great again.

The End