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Dear John,
I have come to visit you for the first time in quite a while, and I must say that your board is dreadfully boring.
Now I know you may see this as a compliment, but I assure you that it is not. This was once a source of pride for me - conversations were held on many topics and the superiority of Pepsi-Cola was never in question. It seems that through the years you have all forgotten the statement of this board: Every conversation is uninteresting.
This does not mean that only excessively droll conversation is allowed. You may talk about anything, especially topics that may not be suited for other boards.
Why am I telling you this, John?
I fear the trends over that past year have created a circlejerk in shades of gray; every man stroking unenthusiastically and not a single climax reached. The board approaches an insipid singularity and the userbase stagnates and shrinks.
What do I feel I can do to halt this monotony?
Remove this monochrome veil.
Turn off the elevator's wail.
Take back your own names.
Move from completely uninteresting to mild interest.
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