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/rnb/ - Rage and Baww
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There's a new /777/ up, it's /selfhelp/ - You're Pathetic, We're Pathetic, We Can Do This! Check it out. Suggest new /777/s here.

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Celsius ## Admin ## 11/08/30(Tue)00:08 No. 5660 ID: 70382c [Reply] [Last 50 posts] Stickied

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stop fucking asking for advice or i'll ban your bitch ass

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Teenage Girl 14/09/02(Tue)12:39 No. 19966 ID: 3690d0

would kusaba even allow that (and are you paying any fucking attention?)?

Teenage Girl 15/10/01(Thu)18:00 No. 20780 ID: 03fab4 [Reply]

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I learned quickly that life isn't fair. I learned quickly nobody really deserves anything. I learned quickly that ideals are simply ideals and the reality is always more likely to run a displeasing course, because the odds the ideals are met outside of all the other possibilities is slim.

These are just really easy concepts.

Despite this, I lived willingly in a naive state for so many years... I knew how it worked, and yet I did not want to believe it. Years and years trudging through utter bullshit, with this foolish notion clouding up what I really knew was true: that if I just sat it out and hoped it changed, it just would. Even better, I started to later convince myself that I would rather play out the last few strings of my rope and let myself rot away. Why kill myself when I can selfishly live the last few months or years doing nothing? Taking what I can while it is still feasible? I don't care anymore if it is frowned upon. I just want to be selfish.

Strangely, I never seriously wanted to kill myself despite my depressive thoughts. I never really wanted my happiness to end. Sad how I came to that conclusion back then. I had promised myself at a point that the next time I was happy, I wanted to kill myself. I wanted to die happy. I didn't want to take the chance death would meet with me one of the thousands of days I spend miserable. Why would I want to die miserable? So that day came after a few months passed. I finally felt okay for one whole day. I remembered my promise, too. I sat in my parents' basement with a fresh straight edge and knew I could finally feel release from this limbo. But I didn't.

I found myself crying and laughing. How could I hesitate? It was perfect. I would finally die and I was anticipating complete relief. I could feel tinges of relief just feeling "it is done, I can finally be done" but here I was hesitating. I felt like it was all wrong, too. I didn't want to die. I never wanted to die. I just wanted to be okay and no longer stuck in life's limbo.

How cowardly and slovenly I have been.

I know nothing will change if I do not make it happen. I just do not think I can, or quite simply, I will not. Something in me refuses and tells me real change is impossible. The effort I put into change in the past always somehow ended up in the same rut I am in now. I need a complete change.

I am thinking of saving up money next job I get, and then just leaving everything. I'll take what I want and die like the slime I am probably within mere months due to certain acts, but I'll know I didn't rot in place for decades regretting ever doing anything or making an impact on the things I have decided to put care into.
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Teenage Girl 15/10/01(Thu)20:01 No. 20781 ID: 7fd13b

Get some sleep, get some money any amount you can get, and get the hell out of where ever you are. You don't need to die to make a drastic change in your life. (Although that would be the most drastic)

Step 1: Get out of the fucking basement

Step 2: do something,anything different. Remote wilderness locations always helped me. Just break whatever routine you are in. Then try to find what got you to a place of wanting to kill yourself and then how to get the hell out of it.

Step 3: Be proud of yourself for not committing suicide, its a pussy way out.
Wanting to live is not a reason for self-loathing.

Step 4: stop whining on the internet about it. That is not going to help at all. Especially here. Jesus, your asking people who would make a meme out of a picture of your corpse for advice.

Teenage Girl 15/10/01(Thu)20:01 No. 20782 ID: 7fd13b

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Teenage Girl 15/02/04(Wed)00:06 No. 20385 ID: 7e6ce7 [Reply]

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A realization I had that bothers me a little.

Bestiality, Furfags, guys thinking they're supposed to be women, every sick fetish you can think of... all stem from the fact that we became accepting of gays. All of those bible thumpers who claimed "If we accept them, next we'll have to accept a man wanted to fuck his dog" were right.

Now, I support gays 100%. I've had a few gay experiences myself. and that's why I'm bothered by this. Every one of these sick fucks has groups of people claiming they're the next form of modern acceptance that must happen. That we're all immoral for thinking a person wanting to be legally identified as a mascot costumed wolf, a man thinking he's a woman if he chops his dick off and takes hormones, or the idea that there are a million genders and orientations and you are whichever one you want to be, are weird or wrong.

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Teenage Girl 15/08/25(Tue)14:42 No. 20723 ID: 811c86

>bought as part of the tobacco settlement
There wasn't anyone else willing to put up the money for the truth's chemo.

Teenage Girl 15/10/01(Thu)17:54 No. 20779 ID: ffb191

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Your logic appears to be terribly flawed.

Teenage Girl 15/10/01(Thu)21:26 No. 20783 ID: 9ca664

I think your mom's terribly flawed m8 :^)

Teenage Girl 15/07/08(Wed)05:25 No. 20657 ID: 7ac9b9 [Reply]

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The veterans affairs has sidestepped the due process clause and has decided to make life harder by cutting my disability by 50%. They never actually looked at any of the doctors notes and have decided that it's more fun to fuck over yet another veteran. I wish these assholes would get LOIK'd into oblivion. Or maybe a virus that paid everyone 100k while making the va computer system think it's operating normally. I bled for corporations in iraq to get rich, so pay me for it bitches. Rrraaawwwrrrrr welding bastards

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your choice poodoo 15/09/30(Wed)20:30 No. 20776 ID: b1d527

Nobody forced you into the army.

nobidy poodoo 15/09/30(Wed)20:31 No. 20777 ID: b1d527

Nobody forced you into the army if you wanted to be rewarded for fucking with people should have become a cop

Teenage Girl 15/09/30(Wed)21:31 No. 20778 ID: 525855

boy did you miss the point

Teenage Girl 15/09/29(Tue)23:52 No. 20773 ID: f4af1f [Reply]

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So my sister announces to me that the guy she lost her virginity to might have gotten her pregnant.

I reassure the girl that there isn't a chance that she's pregnant as she says he didn't finish. (This of course was a lie since looking at a girl the wrong way gets her pregnant)

I really don't need these sorts of shenanigans right now, I mean work is getting better so my sister has to get knocked up, eternally disappointing my mother who is begin to suspect my weed habit.

Just needed to tell someone, I'm losing the plot slowly day by day, pic related in some way

Teenage Girl 15/09/30(Wed)06:04 No. 20775 ID: 10d6c2

Look on the bright side. With your sister creating drama, your mom will be distracted by the turmoil. You can smoke all the weed you want and she won't notice.

Teenage Girl 15/09/15(Tue)19:03 No. 20739 ID: 27b3e7 [Reply]

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Every time I have made a list of priorites, things to do, etc--every single time in 31 years of my life--it is almost immediately and irrecoverably trumped. I have never completed even making a list--not even for just a single day's tasks--not even once.

Either an unforseeable problem that must be handled immediately and prevents other goals from being achieved will occur just after or while making the list, or someone will drop on me an obligation that I never agreed to but am nonetheless bound to do--immediately--because of our relationship (most often work, sometimes goverment officers--I gave up on ever having a chance to do things for family and friends no matter what they expect), or an already long delayed and thus long forgotten task will reassert itself in the form of some personal or professional disaster.

My life has been like this as long as I can remember. It is different from other people's suffering; no one I've ever met has this much trouble with everything, all the time. People often ask me why I look so exhausted and nervous--it is because I've developed an extreme paranoia about setting even the smallest goals.

Basically I live each hour of each day finding out what I missed in the last hour, or what I failed to do the previous day, or what sort of broken thing will prevent me from getting any of several things done until it is fixed, or what someone else thinks I have a legal, professional, or personal obligation to do--every hour of every day.

Once in a while I find myself alone and unoccupied. I try so hard to think of what I should be doing, to make a list of the many things that I should be doing at that moment, but more and more my mind just goes blank. Setting priorities has become that traumatic for me: I'm so afraid of knowing about all the things I already failed that I can't even imagine what they might be. By the time I do think of something I have to do, something else will already be blocking it.

How do I get out of this endless cycle of failure? It makes me suicidally depressed. It has cost me my family, friends, even jobs. I want to live like other people do: setting priorities based on a reasonable schedule and achieving most of them in an order that makes sense, not having to drop everything because their front door broke off it's hinges and their apartment can't be secured (for example). I don't want to answer another angry phone call from someone who has been waiting for me to do something I never even heard about, or telling me to do something that has nothing to do with me immediately because it has to be done right now and I am the only person (in town) who can do it. I can't take setting a goal for the month only to see it pushed off until the next year and then never again.

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Teenage Girl 15/09/24(Thu)05:51 No. 20760 ID: a08a82

Today I was betrayed by a clock.

I have seven different clocks, such that at least one is visible from any angle in every room of my apartment, but I was only watching the one in my living room, where I was.

I woke up early; around 8:30. The clock by my bed said 8:30, and so did the one in the living room. Having two hours to get ready, I took it easy. I didn't notice the living room clock gradually slowing down. I noticed when it stopped at 9:45.

The real time was already 11:00.

Teenage Girl 15/09/29(Tue)11:41 No. 20772 ID: 1d9efc

I've grown to hate time, to hate clocks; they control my entire life, consume most of my thinking.

There's a line from a Star Trek movie, where the bad guy says that, "Time is a predator that hunts us down all our lives." while Picard later counters with, "Time is a companion that travels with us and reminds us to cherish every moment."

For me, time is a giant mallet, whacking me across the head every five minutes, screaming "HEY! HELLO! YOU'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME! DUMBASS! YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE! HEY! COME ONE! HURRY UP!! YOU'RE WASTING TIME! HEY!!" nonstop.

Teenage Girl 15/09/30(Wed)06:02 No. 20774 ID: 10d6c2

That's me on the road. I'm surrounded by lackadaisical idiots who don't have any fucking clue about where they're going or how to get there, so they drive glacially slowly and weave in and out of lanes more often than a drunk driving home on new year's eve, changing direction each time a shiny thing on the side of the road catches their eye.

So rather than have a sense of purpose, a goal in mind, and a plan about how to reach that goal, we spend our time driving under the speed limit in good conditions going from red light to red light to red light, all because they can't think far enough ahead or remember far enough back to time the lights so we always hit greens.

It's so refreshing to drive late at night when nobody's on the road. I get to where I'm going in exactly the amount of time it should take for me to get there. The most I have to deal with are the occasional drunk/chain smoker screeching across 4 lanes of traffic in order to hit the entrance to the 7/11 they just spotted 5 feet ago.

Am I wrong? Teenage Girl 15/07/28(Tue)03:20 No. 20682 ID: f60d7c [Reply]

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I'm wondering how y'all view morality and stuff...

I'm religious, and think homosexuality is an abomination. Even though I morally oppose gay marriage, I don't really care for it because I don't think it makes a difference... society is already sinful and wicked, and homosexuality is just one aspect of that.
I support the freedom to deny wedding requests and if I were a baker or did any form of catering, I'd refuse to do a gay wedding.

I have and wouldn't hesitate to continue speaking against homosexuality. I went through christian schools and knew some gay students. I would not be shy about saying their feelings are abominable.
If I have a wife and kids I will teach my children to be like me. If one of them is gay, I'd still love them, but I'd also condemn them and since I'd be burdened by the concept of them going to hell, I'd try to distance myself.
Not out of hate... but it's reasonable why parents often time disown gay kids. It's not hate, it's because you know they're not going to heaven, so it's painful to get close to them.

However, I do not believe in doing anything I feel directly harms gays?

My question is,.. do I seem like a bigot? Or bad person? Or harmful to gays? Is the fact that I don't believe in directly hurting them enough for you to respect my views.
Doesn't the fact that I support freedom and refuse to do something that would directly take kit way justify my homophobia?
I mean, if I don't support taking away gay peoples freedom or killing them or anything... then why is it wrong for me to be homophobic personally.
And if you're allowed to say it's okay to be gay, then why is it wrong for me to spread my religious beliefs?
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Teenage Girl 15/09/25(Fri)21:50 No. 20768 ID: 2de0cc

For real. You'd think he'd get tired of it, but it's like he doesn't even notice how hard he fails.

Teenage Girl 15/09/26(Sat)09:28 No. 20769 ID: 3d753b

Yeah, deleting my posts was a bit autistic on the mod's part. Didn't even get all of them though, kek.

Teenage Girl 15/09/27(Sun)06:11 No. 20771 ID: 0ab51d

Autistics never realize how autistic they are.

They spend their lives shitting on the floor and getting upset after they get kicked out for it.

They'd fit the mold for a tragic hero except for the little fact that they're just assholes.

Teenage Girl 15/06/28(Sun)14:37 No. 20646 ID: 54d556 [Reply]

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I've reached to a point in my life in which I finally discovered that there is no love, at least for me. Everytime I get to know a female, I take great interest in her for a short while, until routine kicks in and then I just start looking for something else.

No matter how hard I try and focus on the person I want to be with, I eventually grow tired of her. I've already gone through 4 serious relationships and, while telling myself "this is the one" during most of the time, in the end my sad reality hits me in the face every single time.

In conclusion to this, questions are starting to sprout from my brain: is love accepting that you are not going to feel the same way towards your partner, but knowing you want to be with him/her? does love evolve into some sort of friendship after years? is love a plain and simple lie?

Does love exist? Have you found it, /rnb/?

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Teenage Girl 15/09/02(Wed)12:50 No. 20724 ID: f4af57

nobody likes me because i am a ugly son of a bitch who lives with his mom and works in fast food who doesnt have a car..and i dont have the means to change it so i will just die a masturbatory bastard

Teenage Girl 15/09/03(Thu)20:30 No. 20725 ID: 7fd13b



Play that piano till yo fingers bleed, or you get cramps in your fingers that can really hurt.

Teenage Girl 15/09/10(Thu)13:43 No. 20727 ID: 665ef1

Yes. Love is sleeping in a comfortable bed, and having the whole thing to yourself, and whenever you've got to fart, you just let it out, and enjoy.

Only with the feedom of not owning or being owned by another person can one truly experience the greatest love, the love of being alive.

Teenage Girl 15/07/08(Wed)06:01 No. 20658 ID: 2720e7 [Reply]

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Fuck I don't understand it, I don't understand anything nothing feels fucking real anymore I can't even articulate my thoughts anymore on what any of my issues are. I don't get it.

Was anything real to begin with because I don't even fucking know, everywhere I see pattens I don't really exists or not and don't call me crazy I'm not crazy I know what crazy is because I know you're thinking it.

I don't really want to even make this thread, this is stupid.

Your stupid and I'm fine.

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Teenage Girl 15/08/22(Sat)09:44 No. 20718 ID: 903d6d

I think what >>20700 and >>20707 are trying to say is the same thing that https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=yJ6tcq4n9EU demonstrates: lots of people feel and act more similarly than they realize.

In their own backhanded way they were trying to tell you that you're not alone.

Teenage Girl 15/08/24(Mon)22:23 No. 20721 ID: 10d6c2

I was just quoting doxology.
"As it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen."

Or Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land. Take your pick.

OP's still nuttier than a fruitcake.

Teenage Girl 15/08/25(Tue)14:38 No. 20722 ID: 811c86

my comment >>20700 was original, and deep, and true.

Slumber Teenage Girl 15/07/01(Wed)05:06 No. 20650 ID: 2506d6 [Reply]

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I feel like going to sleep for a very long time. Who wants to join me?

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Teenage Girl 15/07/11(Sat)00:22 No. 20666 ID: 8273f1

That headache is dehydration, mostly.

Drinking plenty of water before going to bed prevents that and also motivates you to wake up earlier because you have to get up and take a piss.

Teenage Girl 15/07/13(Mon)09:18 No. 20667 ID: 5e1030

But what if you get up, take a piss, then drink some more liquid and go back to sleep? Rinse, wash, repeat.

You'll still wake up with a headache.

Teenage Girl 15/07/18(Sat)05:31 No. 20669 ID: 9083ba

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Drink your piss. You don't have to get out of bed and you won't wake up with a headache. Win win...

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